The Soft Power Journal

Category: Feminine Leadership

  • Excuses Keep You Stuck: What Are You Still Justifying?

    Excuses Keep You Stuck: What Are You Still Justifying?

    We’ve all done it—defended a choice we outgrew, justified someone’s inconsistency, or explained away our own resistance to growth. But let’s call it what it is: an excuse is still an excuse, no matter how spiritual or intellectual we dress it up to be.

    There’s a difference between honoring your process and avoiding your power. One is rooted in grace. The other in fear.

    Sometimes the most dangerous thing isn’t the habit or the person—it’s the narrative we create around it. The one that lets us stay a little longer in the place we no longer belong. The one that says, “I’m just being patient,” when what we’re really doing is procrastinating on our potential. The one that says, “Maybe they’ll change,” when we know good and well they already showed us who they are.

    The truth? Excuses keep you safe, but they also keep you small. And there comes a point in your journey when protecting your softness requires the kind of structure that no longer allows you to run in circles. When being the woman you prayed to become demands you stop justifying the very things keeping you from her.

    You’re allowed to change your mind. You’re allowed to grow. And you are especially allowed to outgrow the stories that no longer serve you.

    So ask yourself gently—but honestly:

    What are you still explaining away?

    Who are you still making room for that isn’t showing up?

    What are you still calling timing that’s really avoidance?

    You don’t have to shame yourself. You just have to be real enough to call it.

    The moment you stop making excuses is the moment you start making room—for your next level, your next blessing, your next version of you.

    Because liberation doesn’t come with a permission slip. It comes with a decision.

  • Signed: You’re Ready to Be Seen in a New Way

    Signed: You’re Ready to Be Seen in a New Way

    There comes a moment—quiet, sacred, maybe even scary—when you realize:

    You’re not who you used to be anymore.

    You’ve outgrown the mask.

    You’ve softened the armor.

    You’ve grieved the version of you that once needed to be everything for everyone.

    And now? You’re being invited to show up differently.

    Not louder. Not smaller. Not more polished.

    But truer.

    This is your soul’s signature on the dotted line that says:

    I’m ready to be seen. For real this time.

    But being seen… that’s not always easy.

    It sounds beautiful, but it requires layers to be shed.

    Old roles. Old stories. Old coping mechanisms that once kept you safe.

    Because visibility isn’t just about exposure—it’s about vulnerability.

    It’s about letting people meet the version of you that doesn’t need to be understood to feel valid.

    And that kind of presence?

    It changes things. It changes you.

    Here’s what being seen in a new way might look like:

    Saying “no” and not explaining it Taking up space with your softness, not in spite of it

    Letting your joy be loud without apologizing

    Wearing what you like, not what’s “on trend”

    Leaving spaces where you’re only tolerated, not honored

    This isn’t about reinventing yourself. It’s about revealing yourself.

    You don’t need a new brand or identity to be worthy of visibility.

    You just need to let the woman you’ve become finally breathe.

    Let her speak in her own voice.

    Let her rest without guilt.

    Let her be bold without performing.

    Because the truth is—you’ve always been her.

    You just stopped hiding.

    Try this: a Visibility Mirror Ritual

    Stand in front of your mirror. Look into your own eyes.

    Say out loud: “I no longer shrink to be understood. I no longer hide to feel safe. I am ready to be seen, and I trust what is revealed will be held.”

    Repeat it every morning for a week. Watch how your energy shifts.

    If you’re scared of being seen—good. That means it’s real. That means it matters.

    But don’t confuse fear with unreadiness.

    You’ve already done the work.

    You’ve already softened.

    You’ve already begun.

    So this post is your sign.

    Signed: You’re ready to be seen in a new way.

  • The Power You Carry is Already Enough

    The Power You Carry is Already Enough

    There’s this quiet pressure we carry—

    To prove ourselves.

    To be louder. Better. Smarter. More “together.”

    To earn our place in rooms we already belong in.

    And sometimes, even when we’re healing, we still move like we have something to prove.

    But hear me when I say this:

    The power you carry is not waiting on your glow-up. It already exists. Right here. Right now.

    You don’t need to do more to be worthy.

    You don’t need to look different to be powerful.

    You don’t need a perfect plan to take up space.

    I used to think confidence came with perfection.

    That once I looked a certain way, healed a certain wound, or hit a certain milestone—then I’d feel powerful.

    But chasing perfection only made me feel further from myself.

    It took sitting in silence, stripped of the performances and the masks, to realize:

    Power isn’t loud. Power is presence.

    And presence doesn’t mean you have all the answers.

    It just means you know who you are—even when you’re still becoming.

    Let’s redefine what power really looks like:

    Power is choosing yourself when no one else claps.

    It’s walking into a room and not shrinking—even if your voice shakes.

    It’s knowing you can pause, breathe, and still hold weight.

    Power is emotional clarity.

    It’s being able to say “I need a minute” without guilt.

    It’s crying and not calling that a setback.

    Power is not overcompensating.

    You don’t need to over-explain, over-give, or over-do to be enough.

    You already are.

    Here’s how to access the power you already carry:

    1. Anchor into your energy.

    Before any big moment—interview, date, tough conversation—try this:

    Stand tall. Take a breath. Place your hand on your chest.

    Say: “I am already enough. I don’t have to earn this room—I am the room.”

    2. Dismantle the performance.

    Ask yourself: What parts of me are trying to be liked rather than seen?

    Let them rest.

    3. Create a “power playlist.”

    Songs that make you feel like the woman you are when no one’s watching.

    Let them remind you of your presence when you forget.

    4. Write your own receipt.

    List five moments you already showed up in power.

    Moments you stood your ground. Softened without folding. Told the truth.

    That’s your proof.

    You don’t have to perform to be powerful.

    You don’t need more credentials, more validation, or more glow.

    You need more trust in what already lives within you.

    Power doesn’t have to prove itself.

    It just has to be claimed.

    So go ahead and claim it.

    Right here. As you are.

    Because the power you carry?

    It’s already enough.

  • Unapologetic Woman: The Cost of Playing Small and the Power in Taking Up Space

    Unapologetic Woman: The Cost of Playing Small and the Power in Taking Up Space

    There was a time in my life when I mastered the art of shrinking.

    Not physically, of course—but emotionally, energetically, and spiritually. I made myself smaller in conversations so I wouldn’t be “too much.” I muted my opinions so I wouldn’t come off as “difficult.” I accepted crumbs, thinking I didn’t deserve the full meal. I apologized for taking up space. For having needs. For wanting more.

    And I didn’t even realize how loud my silence had become.

    The Subtle Ways We Shrink

    Playing small doesn’t always look like failure—it often looks like “being easy to deal with.” It looks like:

    • Agreeing when your spirit disagrees

    • Smiling when you’re hurting

    • Minimizing your accomplishments so no one feels “less than”

    • Staying in rooms that no longer value your presence

    • Shrinking your dreams because someone else can’t see your vision

    And it chips away at you. Quietly.

    Until one day, you don’t recognize the woman you’ve become.

    The Breaking Point Wasn’t Loud—It Was a Whisper

    It didn’t happen all at once. It was subtle. Soft. A conversation where I felt invisible. A job where my voice didn’t matter. A relationship where I poured and poured until I had nothing left. I remember sitting in my car thinking: I don’t think I’ve ever truly chosen myself.

    I had been making peace offerings with my power.

    Every time I stayed quiet, every time I settled—I was negotiating my worth.

    The Lie We’re Told: That Power Makes Us Unlovable

    They tell women to be humble, soft-spoken, agreeable. To let others lead.

    But I’ve learned that real love never asks you to be less of yourself.

    And any space that requires your silence is not a safe space—it’s a cage.

    The truth is:

    You’re not intimidating. They’re just not used to a woman who doesn’t apologize for being whole.

    You’re not “too much.” You’re simply more than they’re ready to receive.

    You’re not dramatic. You’re just finally being honest.

    Taking Up Space is a Power Move—Not a Personality Flaw

    When I stopped playing small, I didn’t become aggressive—I became honest. I started asking for what I needed. I raised my standards. I said no without guilt. I stopped watering myself down and started blooming where I was planted—even if no one clapped for me.

    Taking up space means:

    • Walking into a room and knowing you belong without needing permission

    • Reclaiming your time, your energy, your voice

    • Owning your power without fear of rejection

    • Allowing yourself to be fully expressed—soft and strong, bold and kind

    And that’s what scares people.

    Not your flaws. Not your past.

    But the fact that you’re no longer afraid to own your light.

    To the Woman Who’s Been Playing Small: It’s Time

    You weren’t born to dim.

    You weren’t made to shrink.

    And you were never meant to blend in.

    I know it’s scary to take up space when the world teaches you to disappear.

    But every time you choose yourself, you show another woman what’s possible.

    And that’s how we rise—together.

    A Soft Power Affirmation

    I am no longer available for spaces that silence me.

    I do not dim. I do not shrink.

    I rise. I radiate. I take up space with grace.

    You are not asking for too much.

    You are finally asking from a place that knows her worth.

    And that, my love, changes everything.