The Soft Power Journal

Tag: Resilience

  • Dear Former Me:

    Dear Former Me:

    This isn’t a letter to my past self, but a poem that grew from the same soil. It’s called Behind the Smile…

    Behind the smile is a girl who’s tired of waiting for people to see her fire.

    She laughs loud but it’s a shield,

    a soft heart wrapped in the battlefield.

    Behind the smile is the weight of “I’m fine”.

    A thousand no’s dressed up like a sign.

    It’s cracked ribs from holding it in.

    The art of breaking without making a scene.

    She beams like the sun- on purpose not ease

    ‘cause no one asked how she weathered the freeze.

    She shows up radiant, dressed in gold, but no one asked what that brightness holds

    Behind the smile is grief that lingers.

    Dreams slipping through trembling fingers.

    The girl who claps for everyone’s win, but wonders when hers will begin.

    It’s the mask she wears to keep peace alive,

    the ache she silences just to survive.

    It’s knowing her worth in a world that forgot

    and loving herself whether seen or not.

    So next time you see her and she grins wide,

    don’t just compliment the light in her eyes.

    Ask her how long she’s been standing alone,

    holding her softness like a cornerstone because behind the smile,

    there’s strength you’ll never measure

    a soul stitch together

    by pain

    and still by pleasure.

    Evelyn Michelle

  • Dear Former Me-Thank You for Letting Go

    Dear Former Me-Thank You for Letting Go

    Dear Former Me,

    I know how hard you tried to hold it all together.

    Even when your heart was tired.

    Even when your spirit whispered this isn’t it—you still leaned in, still hoped, still made space for someone who wasn’t ready to meet you there.

    I saw how you twisted yourself into softer shapes,

    how you over-explained just to feel seen,

    how you called silence patience and tension love.

    You didn’t want to walk away. You wanted it to work.

    But deep down, I know you knew:

    love shouldn’t feel like negotiating your worth.

    So thank you—for finally letting go.

    Not in anger. Not in resentment.

    But in clarity.

    You let go of needing to be chosen.

    You let go of shrinking your needs.

    You let go of waiting for someone else to grow.

    And in doing that,

    you came back home to yourself.

    I know it hurt.

    But you learned to stop interpreting distance as your fault.

    You stopped calling someone’s emotional unavailability a challenge to overcome.

    You stopped begging for presence in the form of crumbs.

    You stopped settling for almost.

    Thank you for the nights you cried but didn’t reach back out.

    Thank you for choosing peace over potential.

    Thank you for walking away, not because you stopped caring—

    but because you finally started caring about yourself more.

    Because of you, I don’t abandon myself anymore.

    I no longer confuse mixed signals for magic.

    I no longer carry the weight of their unreadiness.

    I no longer perform for love I deserve to receive with ease.

    So thank you.

    You didn’t fail.

    You finally honored the version of you who’s been waiting to be free.

    With so much pride,

    Evelyn

  • Dear Former Me- I Thought He Cared About Me

    Dear Former Me- I Thought He Cared About Me

    Dear Former Me,

    Are you sick of me yet? Because I’m sick of me. I really, really, really hate myself right now. I hate that I’m so forgiving. I hate that I seem to piss people off so much without trying. I hate that I change myself hoping someone will love me but they never do. All they do is hurt me. Again. And Again. And again. And I let them.. Because that’s just who I am. I really, really want to hurt people sometimes.. But you know what’s crazier? I hate myself for feeling that way so then.. I just hurt myself. Literally. I literally will do whatever I can to just punish myself because how evil of a person do I have to be in order to actually feel like hurting someone else? 

    I’m pretty freaking sick right?

     You know my boyfriend? Prince? News Freaking Flash.. NEVER DATE A GUY NAMED PRINCE. He is ANYTHING BUT A PRINCE. He’s an abusive jerk. I probably could use stronger language but I’m trying to get right with God. Prince choked me.. And not just that he called me a Negro from the streets. And screamed in my face and tried to choke me into the closet.. And I STILL TRIED TO TAKE HIM BACK TO HIS PLACE since he was just drunk out of his freaking mind. Guess what?! That didn’t happen. I had to call the cops on him because he wouldn’t stop screaming from the back seat of my car and then climbed to the front seat and I had to pull over only for him to choke me and spit in my face. 

    And you know the worst part? I didn’t want him to go to jail. I just wanted him to leave me alone.. so now I’m going to have to dodge the police because I’m not going to court to testify against him? Stupid? Idk maybe.. but here’s the thing.. I just don’t want to ruin someone’s life even if they really hurt me. And I would rather just be left alone.. I’m tired of always having to fight. I’ve literally been fighting my entire life. My mom, my family, girls in detention centers, boyfriends.. like this is exhausting.. I don’t know how I find myself in these stupid situations.

    It’s like… these guys start off really great.. but then.. BOOM full crazy.. and here’s the thing.. I don’t even like fighting. The only reason I ever fought in the past was because my mom would make me fight these kids in my neighborhood.. like literally make me fight them. Or I was on the run after my mom beat me up and kicked me out of the house so .. all of a sudden I was a 10 year old kid having to fight grown women and adults off of me in the streets of Las Vegas.. 

    Dude.. why do guys feel like they can hurt me all the time. I don’t even do anything to them… it’s like.. me being happy somehow is me being disrespectful? I should’ve hit him back.. I promise you I should’ve. I need to stop letting people hit me.. I don’t deserve that. I really don’t. It just.. is Normal I guess. 

    Idk.. God.. please help me find the courage to leave ..

    Evelyn.. if you’re reading this.. just know you made it through. You guys broke up. He wasn’t your man.. he might’ve been a man but not your man.. because any man who loves you wouldn’t put his hands on you, or be verbally abusive. He would love you the way that God loves you. And you deserve that. Even if you don’t believe that right now.. just know that I do.

    I’m proud of you for ending the relationship. And if I know you like I think I do, you didn’t do no dramatic exit .. you just let it go with grace. Trust me.. God has something and someone way better than you could’ve ever imagined. Just.. trust him.. Also, if a man EVER puts his hands on you again.. YOU STAND 10 toes down on business and you CALL THE COPS. Never fight men but you have every right to fight against your oppressor. Once a man decides to hit you. He is not a man. He is your oppressor.. you got this.. just keep praying .. it’s going to get better right? Yes.. it’s going to get better.

    I love you Evelyn. I’m sorry I didn’t protect you more but I promise.. I promise I’m going to be your protector from now on. I know this is new territory to us.. you’ve never had someone protect you growing up aside from Grandma.. so it’s going to be a learning experience but, we’re going to learn together. We’re going to learn and we’re going to be ok. You know how I know? Because God has been with us through worse. He has never left us empty handed and because I GOT YOU. If NOBODY ELSE has you, just know that I do. God’s plan. Not Ours. God’s plan.

    I love you so much Evelyn. You are so resilient. You are light. And you deserve better than anything you’ve ever been through. I got us baby.

    Forever yours,

    Evelyn 

  • Protect Your Softness, But Never Mistake It for Weakness

    Protect Your Softness, But Never Mistake It for Weakness

    There’s a misconception that being soft means being weak. That a woman who embraces her femininity, her emotions, and her tenderness is somehow naive or fragile.

    But real softness? Is strength in disguise.

    It takes power to remain soft in a world that tries to harden you. It takes discipline to choose grace when you could retaliate. It takes wisdom to know when to be gentle and when to be firm.

    But let’s be clear—being soft does not mean being a pushover.

    Softness With Boundaries is Unstoppable

    Too many women either suppress their softness in an attempt to be “strong” or let people take advantage of it by lacking boundaries.

    True feminine power lies in balance. It’s about knowing:

    • Your kindness is a choice, not an obligation.

    • Your patience has limits, and those limits must be respected.

    • Your emotions are valuable, but they do not control you.

    • Your ability to love deeply does not mean you tolerate disrespect.

    Softness without strength invites mistreatment. Strength without softness breeds isolation. The most powerful women master both.

    How to Protect Your Softness Without Losing Your Strength

    1. Trust Your Intuition – Being soft doesn’t mean ignoring red flags. Honor your inner knowing and act accordingly.

    2. Set Boundaries Without Guilt – You can be warm and loving while still saying, “This does not work for me.”

    3. Recognize Who Deserves Your Energy – Not everyone is worthy of your gentleness. Save it for those who appreciate it.

    4. Stand Firm When Necessary – Your softness is not an excuse for anyone to underestimate you. If they do, let them be surprised when you remind them otherwise.

    You Can Be Both—And That’s the Secret

    The world tells women they must choose: Be soft or be strong. Be kind or be firm. Be loving or be powerful.

    But the truth? You were never meant to choose. You were meant to be both.

    Soft, but untouchable.

    Loving, but not naive.

    Open-hearted, but with an iron backbone.

    Because a woman who can master both softness and strength? She is unstoppable.

  • Unleash Your Inner Power: Owning Your Confidence and Strength

    Unleash Your Inner Power: Owning Your Confidence and Strength

    There comes a time when you stop asking for permission to take up space. When you stop apologizing for your strength, your beauty, and your voice. We’ve all been conditioned to shrink, to play small, to make ourselves easier to digest for others. But what if I told you that the world doesn’t need your apology? What if you could stop waiting for approval and start standing in your power, unapologetically?

    This is your reminder: You have the right to take up space, to be seen, to be heard. You are powerful, just as you are.

    The Power of Confidence:

    Confidence isn’t a trait reserved for the select few. It’s something you can cultivate within yourself, daily, with every action you take, every word you speak. But here’s the truth: Confidence doesn’t come from perfection. It comes from trusting yourself and owning your worth.

    Too often, we let self-doubt and fear prevent us from fully stepping into our power. We wait for others to validate us, to tell us we’re worthy, or to approve of our success. But the key to unlocking your power is realizing that you don’t need anyone’s permission to be confident.

    It’s about knowing that you deserve everything you’ve ever dreamed of—and more. It’s about owning your brilliance, your mistakes, and everything in between. Confidence comes from within, from trusting that you are enough, no matter what anyone else thinks or says.

    Breaking Free from Expectations:

    Society loves to box us in. Women, especially, are expected to be quiet, humble, submissive. We’re told to shrink to make others feel comfortable. But why? Why should we be apologetic for our accomplishments, our beauty, our ambition?

    The truth is, you don’t owe anyone an apology for being exactly who you are. If you want to be loud, be loud. If you want to chase your dreams, chase them relentlessly. If you want to shine, shine brighter than you ever thought possible.

    Here’s the thing—being authentic, unapologetic, and confident isn’t about arrogance. It’s about embracing your true self and showing the world who you really are. When you step into your power, you become a beacon of light for others to do the same.

    Owning Your Strength and Beauty:

    You are not defined by what others think of you or what they expect you to be. You are defined by your strength, your grace, and your unwavering belief in your own worth.

    It’s time to stop placing conditions on your beauty and your worth. Your strength isn’t just in how you look—it’s in how you carry yourself, how you stand tall in the face of adversity, how you rise after every fall. You are powerful beyond measure, and that power lies in accepting every part of yourself—flaws, scars, and all.

    Don’t wait for anyone to validate your existence. You are already enough. Your beauty, your strength, your energy—they are all essential parts of the whole you. Own them.

    Personal Reflection:

    There was a time when I second-guessed myself constantly. I questioned whether I was enough, whether I deserved to be successful, whether I could handle the weight of my dreams. But once I realized that my worth isn’t determined by anyone else, everything changed.

    I stopped waiting for permission to be confident. I stopped apologizing for taking up space. And you know what? The moment I stopped shrinking, the world around me started to open up in ways I never imagined.

    That doesn’t mean it’s always easy. Confidence is a practice. It’s something you choose every day. And trust me, when you step into your power, you’ll start seeing results you didn’t even know were possible.

    How to Unleash Your Inner Power:

    1. Stop Apologizing for Your Success: You worked hard for it. Don’t shrink back when you accomplish something. Own your success and celebrate it.

    2. Embrace Your Voice: Speak up. Let your voice be heard, whether it’s at work, in relationships, or in your community. Your voice has power.

    3. Trust Yourself: Confidence comes from within, so start trusting your instincts. When you trust yourself, you make decisions from a place of strength, not fear.

    4. Stop Comparing: Comparison is the thief of joy. Focus on your own journey, and remember that you are on your own path.

    5. Be Kind to Yourself: Confidence doesn’t mean perfection. It means accepting yourself, flaws and all, and treating yourself with the same love and respect you give others.

    Call to Action:

    I want to challenge you today: Look in the mirror, and see yourself as the strong, powerful, and worthy person you are. The world needs your confidence, your voice, and your strength. Don’t wait for anyone to give you permission to be bold and fierce. Start right now.

    Take a step toward owning your power. Whether it’s a small action or a big leap, start today. I’d love to hear how you’re stepping into your confidence—share in the comments, on social media, or in your personal journal.

    Conclusion:

    We are all worthy of being seen, being heard, and owning our space. The world needs your strength and your unapologetic confidence. The moment you step into your power, you become unstoppable. Don’t wait for anyone to give you permission. Step into your greatness now.

    You are powerful. You are enough. You are ready.

  • How to Cultivate Soft Power in a Hard World

    How to Cultivate Soft Power in a Hard World

    Because Strength Doesn’t Have to Be Loud

    In a world that often celebrates loudness and dominance, embracing soft power can feel counterintuitive. But it’s precisely this quieter, more intentional strength that has the power to inspire, influence, and transform lives.

    Soft power isn’t about being passive. It’s about moving with grace, setting boundaries with confidence, and trusting your presence is enough. In this post, I’ll share practical ways to cultivate soft power so you can navigate life with quiet strength and unshakable self-worth.

    1️⃣ Understand the Essence of Soft Power

    Soft power isn’t about shrinking or staying silent. It’s about choosing your energy wisely and being intentional with your words, actions, and presence.

    Think of soft power as the ability to influence and inspire without force. It’s rooted in self-trust, emotional intelligence, and the knowledge that true strength doesn’t have to demand attention—it naturally commands it.

    2️⃣ Master the Art of Stillness

    In a noisy world, stillness is a superpower. Instead of reacting to every situation, cultivate the habit of pausing, observing, and responding with intention.

    • Why It Matters: Stillness allows you to process your emotions and think clearly before taking action.

    • How to Practice: The next time you’re faced with a stressful situation, take a deep breath, pause, and ask yourself: “What outcome aligns with my values?”

    3️⃣ Speak Less, Mean More

    One of the hallmarks of soft power is the ability to communicate effectively without saying too much.

    • Why It Matters: Words carry weight when they’re used intentionally.

    • How to Practice: Before speaking, ask yourself: “Is this true? Is it kind? Is it necessary?” This approach ensures your words are purposeful and impactful.

    4️⃣ Set Boundaries with Grace

    Soft power doesn’t mean being a pushover. It means knowing your worth and being confident in protecting your peace.

    • Why It Matters: Boundaries create space for respect and mutual understanding.

    • How to Practice: Use phrases like:

    • “I appreciate you asking, but I need to focus on myself right now.”

    • “This doesn’t align with what’s best for me, but thank you for thinking of me.”

    5️⃣ Trust in Divine Timing

    Soft power is deeply rooted in faith—faith in yourself, your intuition, and the timing of life.

    • Why It Matters: When you trust that what’s meant for you will come, you stop chasing and start attracting.

    • How to Practice: Shift your mindset from scarcity (“I have to act now or I’ll miss my chance”) to abundance (“What’s meant for me won’t pass me by”).

    6️⃣ Embody Confidence, Not Force

    Confidence is magnetic when it’s quiet and secure. Soft power allows you to exude self-assurance without forcing it.

    • Why It Matters: Confidence rooted in self-worth doesn’t need external validation.

    • How to Practice: Focus on how you feel, not how you’re perceived. Affirm to yourself: “I am enough as I am.”

    Final Reflection

    Cultivating soft power is about showing up for yourself in a way that feels authentic, grounded, and aligned with your values. It’s about trusting your presence, energy, and ability to navigate life with grace and intention.

    So, here’s my challenge for you:

    💬 What’s one way you can start embracing soft power in your life today?

    Let me know your thoughts in the comments—I’d love to hear your story.

  • Welcome to The Soft Power Journal: Because Strength Doesn’t Have To Be Loud

    Welcome to The Soft Power Journal: Because Strength Doesn’t Have To Be Loud

    For so long, I believed strength had to be loud. That power meant proving yourself—asserting your value through force or presence. But over time, life has taught me something different. True strength is soft. It’s resilient, grounded, and deeply rooted in self-awareness. It’s the kind of power that doesn’t demand attention but instead draws it naturally.

    That’s the essence of The Soft Power Journal, and I’m so excited to share this space with you.

    Why I Started This Blog

    I created this blog as a place to document my journey of growth, grace, and embracing the quiet strength within. Over the years, I’ve learned that life is always teaching us something, whether through challenges, moments of joy, or the people we meet along the way.

    Here, I’ll share those lessons—sometimes through personal reflections, other times through stories of people who’ve inspired me. This is a space where I can process, connect, and hopefully inspire others who are navigating their own journeys.

    What You Can Expect

    The Soft Power Journal will be a blend of journal-style entries, personal growth lessons, and reflections on what it means to embody soft power. Some posts will explore themes like intuition, grace, and transformation. Others will focus on practical ways to embrace a high-value mindset, live intentionally, and stay true to yourself.

    I’ll also share stories from others—those who’ve taught me valuable lessons about strength, growth, and resilience. My hope is that this blog becomes a place where we can learn and grow together.

    Welcome to the Journey

    This is just the beginning of The Soft Power Journal, and I can’t wait to share this journey with you. Whether you’re here for inspiration, insight, or a sense of connection, I hope you’ll find somethings that resonates deeply.

    Thank you for being here—welcome to a space of reflection, growth, and soft power.